anyone else suffer from depression and / or anxiety ?

[whyzee]

I know people will not want to talk about this openly but maybe it will help those of us who suffer.
mine has gotton worse since I got hurt in 09 and had to give up riding motocross. It seemed motocross was my ' drug ' that got me through all of life's curveballs. I could always count on it to make me calm and happy.
I have a doc that I see. I take meds to help but the side effects suck! I don't drink or smoke, which is a form of self medication for most people.
I figured it might feel good to know that I am not alone or learn other peoples coping skills.
I am lucky enough to still ride 3 or 4 times a week around the yard, but nothing compares with racing motocross. My doc says I am an adrenaline junkie and that is a dangerous problem ( obviously )
Anyone else care to chime in? My wife is getting tired of me moping around the house when I get home from work and its not fair to my kids.
Thanks for listening.

[atc007]

Hmmmm,,,NEVER would have guessed that about you ??? Everyone says I should be with everything that's crammed into my house,,but I feel I'm not. Like you,I get on something with a engine and go blow off steam. One of our Foster sons had anxiety attacks. My 1st time dealing with it. We were working, finishing a 2000 sq ft basement. All was well,he was SO proud of what he was learning,{ he was throwing knotty pine on the interior studs} and he just started shaking. I thought,,wow,,,this is the real deal, NO stress,he was Proud,Happy and smiling and ,Boom,,had an attack. He was on meds also. I'm PM'ing you my #,call me and we can swap war stories! All I can say is focus on the Positive things you have. Your health,your kids! your wife and families health. But I know sometimes it isn't that easy.

[whyzee]

Thanks Bill ! I have suffered from anxiety attacks since my teens..seems I am good for a major one every few years...out if the blue, just like you described. Bam!

[Swinger]

I have been through some dark and depressing times and suicide seemed like an easy escape. I never was one for the easy way though and struggled on. Good thing too, I have a great family to keep me buzy and in line now a days. When you get depressed it just takes over and doesnt only affect you but everyone around you also. Keep you head up man

[whyzee]

Its nice to know we are all kind of family on here.

[dcreel]

I've been dealing with depression since childhood. Suicide attempt and subsequent 4 week stint in a mental hospital at 16 years of age. As a teen I dealt with mental pain by inflicting physical pain on myself. Cutting, burning, punching things. Scars are a constant reminder. 2 divorces and 2 children in 2 different states than me hasn't helped much. My current wife has helped to keep me on an even keel. It has gotten better somewhat since I quit drinking and using drugs, easier to control anyways. Winters in Kansas key it up and make life difficult at times. I've learned to talk myself down and relax somewhat. My mind has a way of traveling the 5 degrees of seperation trip. Doesn't matter where my mind starts to wander I always end up missing my kids and hurting for it.

It's a daily struggle.. The little train that could.. you just keep chuggin along. Making my children proud of me keeps me going.

[Swinger]

I found that the serenity of fishing was an awesome perscription for me. I lost both of my brothers in 05 due to motor cycle crashes 2 months apart from each other and severe depression led to suicide attempts,drug abuse and alcohol abuse. At the time I thought the drugs and booze made me feel better but it only made everything worse and turned me into more of an emotional wreck that I already was. I still think and talk about my bros everyday and miss them dearly and everytime I see my one brothers daughter I just wanna squeeze her and tell her all about her dad but she is still to young for that, he died 2 days before she was born. I have never suffered from the anxiety but depression is rough. Me and my brothers always loved to fish and were very competitive against each other as all brothers are. Now that they are gone and I venture out by myself I kinda feel they are actually with me and with that and the sound of the water and nature all around it brings me a well needed relaxation. Not saying that fishing will work for you but there is something out there that will work without taking a bunch of crap that docs give you to numb everything.

[fabiodriven]

I have anxiety/depression/PTSD that I brought home with me from Iraq in '03. I know this subject very, very well.

I had the first anxiety attack of my life in the middle of the desert in '03. I didn't know what was happening to me because I had never felt anxiety prior to that in my entire 23 years on this planet. I went off to be by myself when all I wanted to do was see a doctor. The problem was that we were about 45 minutes from the nearest doctor. Our camp was just a spec in the open desert and there were no doctors there. In order for me to get to the hospital it would have taken 2 vehicles and 4 soldiers other than myself to get there. So now I would have been putting 4 other people's lives at risk just so I could get to the doctor. I didn't tell anyone what was happening and I sat there and cried for an hour or so. After it passed I felt fine but I had no idea what had just happened.

On the redeployment (being sent back to the states from Iraq) you go through a series of doctors, shrinks, etc, and they all kept asking me how I felt. I kept telling them that I felt fine and I really didn't understand why it was that they kept asking me. I did feel fine while I was still in uniform. The problems didn't arise until after I got back to civilian life, that's when you can see the change. I quickly found out that I couldn't go out in public with my girlfriend at the time, I couldn't eat or drink in front of anyone more than just her and I, and I vomited a lot if I tried to do these things. A trip to the V.A. was in order, so that's where I went.

Within the first 15 minutes of being there the doctor handed me a prescription and I asked him what it was for. He told me it was for PTSD and I had extreme anxiety and depression. The pills absolutely sucked and I took them about three times. I told them for years that I was taking them when I wasn't. That went on for about 4 years or so until the PTSD started to get a good grip on me and I had to take something. I asked the doctor if there was something I could take in a "flareup" instead of numbing my mind every day and turning me into a drug addict (which is what they're trying to do to you whyzee). They put me on Clonazepam which was a great band-aid at the time (which is all drugs are good for) while I worked on my coping skills. This drug is highly addictive and not good for you (as most drugs are). I used it responsibly for about a year until I had my coping skills refined and I ditched the drugs. That was about 3 years ago. Today the only medication I take is a natural herbal supplement;) and it works wonders with little to no side effects.

THIS IS HOW YOU DEAL WITH ANXIETY/DEPRESSION FROM SOMEONE WHO KNOWS-

The first thing you should do is throw the galldang pills out the window, unless you're going to use them sparingly for a short time and that's it. Your first goal should be to get away from the pills. Our government wants to turn us all into drug addicts and our people are all too willing to let this happen. Everybody is on a pill for something. Why? Because people want to be high and they want an easy solution to everything. Why else? Because our government gets rich from our pill consumption and a high citizen is a happy citizen who doesn't make any waves. Everybody is on something these days for something and it is just wrong, period. People are on pills for sleeping, anxiety, depression, being too fat, being to hyper, being too stupid, because they got a hangnail, because they need a haircut, WHATEVER. People DO NOT NEED ALL OF THESE PILLS! The answer to your problems is not in a miracle little pill. Can't sleep? Burn some energy. Go for a run. Stop eating crap all the time. Too fat? Same solution. Anxiety? Depression? Same solution. See the pattern here?

It has been 8 years since I was diagnosed with severe anxiety/depression and I am doing very well for myself. It barely bothers me anymore. I own my own house, I have a great job, plenty of money, weekends off, tons of friends, I don't drink much, and I've been cutting down on smoking. Hell, I even date the girl from my hometown who I wanted more than anything in the world when I was 18 or 19 years old. She's a smoking hot blond who's 6 years younger than me. Long story short, I have SEVERE anxiety/depression and I am living the dream. How?

Like I said, get rid of the drugs. Feeling anxious? Work out. Buy yourself a BowFlex. Can't afford a BowFlex? Do push-ups and sit-ups. Change your diet. People weren't made to eat hamburgers and pizza every day. Eat something that's good for you. Get some of the herbal supplement;) if you can. All of these drugs that doctors want to shove down your throat are not only not good for your body and mind, they're BAD for your body and mind. So you hurt yourself while making the rich richer. Sound good to you? Not me! There are NATURAL ways of helping many of your problems that may or may not be legal. F%*k what the law says. I know what's right and what's wrong, and so do you. The natural endorphins your body releases from exercising will help you more than those stupid pills ever will. Sure, you might feel OK for a couple hours after you take a pill while your brain turns to mush, but what do you do when that wears out? Take another pill. Then another, then another, then more and more and more until you've forgotten how to deal with anything unless you're on pills. Is that what you want? You have to learn to cope with what's going on inside your head and you have to make a conscious decision on how you want to feel. It's all in YOUR head. How do you want to feel? You want to be happy? That's your choice. Is there a reason you are anxious/depressed? DON'T THINK ABOUT IT. Think about things that make you happy. Nobody is going to do it for you. YOU have to make the decision. Once you're happy and out of the cloud, things will come to you. People will want to talk to you and it's a vicious cycle of happiness. You smile, you make other people smile, they make you smile, hooray! Everybody wins! BUT IT'S YOUR CHOICE! Do NOT let a man in a lab coat tell you how you should feel. Tell yourself how you want to feel and make it happen!

[jb104]

I go through anxiety off and on and it is hard to deal with sometimes. It can paralize you from fear and seems like you can not go forward just stuck in whatever your thinking. My mom gave me a book to read called Power thoughts. So far it has some great things. The author is Joyce Meyers she is a Christian so a lot of the book is focused around God so it might not appeal to everyone but it is helping me. Also if you can't motorcross maybe you can get a side by side to go out with your kids or friends trail riding. I know it is not the same but it might help. Have a nice day.

[El Camexican]

I'm going to copy your post and send it to a friend of my Flab. That sums up every thing I've been tring to preach to him for the past 4 years and then some. Thanks for the post and thanks for your service.

[zzmegad]

a great job, plenty of money, and a smokin hot younger blonde would help my depression also...

all joking aside, great post. I really dislike the doctors in that field who prescribe those types of medications. Theres a documentary out called generation RX, I haven't personally seen it yet, but you can guess what it's about..

I am also going to share the post with a couple of close people in my life.

[fabiodriven]

a great job, plenty of money, and a smokin hot younger blonde would help my depression also...



If that's what you want zzmegad....

No need to set limits on anything you do in life. Shoot for the moon.

[ditchmud]

I'm afraid that i would have to disagree. No two people are alike and what works for one person might not be the best solution for another. I would not take mental health advice from an internet forum from people who do not know your situation. Find yourself a good Doctor and be 100% honest with them to get a proper diagnosis.

[fabiodriven]

^^^He's right, just ask the doctor. That's why they have a whole assortment of pills.^^^

What's your story? What do you know of this subject?

[El Camexican]

If that's what you want zzmegad....

No need to set limits on anything you do in life. Shoot for the moon.

"Aim for the eagle, bag the pheasant and never eat crow"

[ezmoney1979]

Great post Fabio. Thanks for sharing your experiences and remedys;). Many people cant stand him but he speaks a lot of truth- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MdHg6_pDbSI

[fabiodriven]

Great post Fabio. Thanks for sharing your experiences and remedys;). Many people cant stand him but he speaks a lot of truth- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MdHg6_pDbSI

I'm amazed to see my thoughts so clearly shared by other people. Thank you for that post EZ. Open your eyes people!!!

[briano]

I'm going through some sh!t right now with my mother that I know is affecting my life. We had a disagreement a few weeks back and I feel like crap about it. Well here's the story. Last fall my fiancé and I bought a house because we had a baby due in November, this is good. We had a beautiful healthy baby girl on Nov. 28. In December our well went dry, now I'm gettin stressed a little. My fiancé went back to work in January so I have our daughter for 5 hours after work everyday. I love to be with her and am adapting quite well, we still have a water shortage. Now about a month ago my mom and dad came to see the baby and my mother comes out talking about my weight and I need to exercise. I'm 6'3" and about 250, I could stand to loose a few lbs but coming from my mother the way she said it, it hurt. Then my fiancé ended up in the hospital for a couple nights with horrible stomach pains and no answers as to what is wrong, aaah stress again. When she gets out my mother tells her that she should stay at home more so I can be out doing things, because she feels I am depressed and angry. Well now I'm getting there, so Sunday is Easter and my parents don't call or come over to see their granddaughters first Easter. Now I'm there!!! I feel like I could explode sometimes during the day, my girl will not remember grandma n grandpa not being there for her first Easter, but I will. I want to talk to them but it won't be civil, I may have to just let them go. I feel that would be best, no more drama. It just the way my mom has come out and said some bad things in the last month and then not see my baby. I am trying to let all this go but it hurts like hell deep down.

Thanks for reading and listening. Sorry for rambling I am not thinking straight lately.

[whyzee]

Haven't had a chance to watch the video. I really appreciate your post Fabio. Thank you for your service to protect my freedom.
I haven't been as lucky as some of you guys in toughing it out through the anxiety issues. I have tried fighting it and will stop taking my medication and within a year or so I am in the ER in a full blown manic/panic attack. Usually by ambulance.
I have had the same Dr for 22 yrs and she retired 6 years ago and I now see the Dr who took over her practice.
This depression and anxiety is not a new thing for me. It comes in cycles. BP 2 she calls it.
I know its not cancer guys and sometimes tough love is the best medicine, but if anyone of you know someone who is bi polar you can understand.

Thanks for all the replies everyone. I welcome all advice.

[Chazz of Blades]

I suffer from pretty bad depression and low self esteem, it happens most any time I'm alone and bored. I've always had a stressful home life, and growing up in school was tough. I try to find little things I can do that take my mind off of it, I've found that if I ignore it, it goes away. I've been down hard enough that I just cried. I've not done that in nearly two years, but once I just sat down and cried, and there didn't seem to be an exact reason! I hate it, it hates me. But I'm stronger than it, and I know all of you are too.

[ditchmud]

^^^He's right, just ask the doctor. That's why they have a whole assortment of pills.^^^

What's your story? What do you know of this subject?


I am bi-polar, and grew up with a bi-polar mother that never was treated for her illness. I don't talk about it because people don't understand and usually end up alienating themselves from me. I always had emotional issues growing up but i wasn't diagnosed untill 2001 when I was 30 years old. At first I would take my meds reluctantly for a month or more untill I thought that I felt better then I would stop taking them. Well that never turned out well. I finally realized that I do need to take the medication and although I do not like it I will have to do so for the rest of my life. It sucks, I hate it, and I know that it's poisoning my body but my brain has a chemical imbalance that needs medicine to take care of. I am not a Doctor so I am not an expert on mental illness. I am however an expert on me and my own situation and I can tell you that nothing will keep me on a more even keel than taking my meds as I am supposed to.

I think that excercise and keeping yourself busy are good recomendations and hopefully will work for a lot of people. Everyone has to find what works best for them and a good Doctor is the best place to start for help finding ways to cope. If taking medicine is what it takes than it's ok.

[atc007]

Our latest foster girls parents are Both Bi polar.And he is Manic on top of that. She is 11 yo. She Has never seen anything different. She is a only child. She is a actual miracle for what she has probably been thru.. Again,I do not know what it's like 1st hand,,therefore have No business pretending I do. But In our field we have Lived with a LOT of it, in our home and families of our kids. . It would certainly be nice if Fabios ways worked for everyone. Great advice indeed. Briano,wish we could help. Sounds like there's more below the surface there. My son and D in law moved out last Thursday over a STUPID reason. Not a damn thing I could do. Life is tough. Somedays just SUCK. Just have to look at all the good,and not worry about the rest. It's hard sometimes,but it works. there are WAY too many things that we cannot control that we wish/ think we should be able to..... We can't.

[fabiodriven]

I am bi-polar, and grew up with a bi-polar mother that never was treated for her illness. I don't talk about it because people don't understand and usually end up alienating themselves from me. I always had emotional issues growing up but i wasn't diagnosed untill 2001 when I was 30 years old. At first I would take my meds reluctantly for a month or more untill I thought that I felt better then I would stop taking them. Well that never turned out well. I finally realized that I do need to take the medication and although I do not like it I will have to do so for the rest of my life. It sucks, I hate it, and I know that it's poisoning my body but my brain has a chemical imbalance that needs medicine to take care of. I am not a Doctor so I am not an expert on mental illness. I am however an expert on me and my own situation and I can tell you that nothing will keep me on a more even keel than taking my meds as I am supposed to.

I think that excercise and keeping yourself busy are good recomendations and hopefully will work for a lot of people. Everyone has to find what works best for them and a good Doctor is the best place to start for help finding ways to cope. If taking medicine is what it takes than it's ok.

Thanks for sharing.

I have known a few bipolar people growing up and that is indeed a tough one. Aside from the anxiety and depression I think (I'm no expert here mind you) being bipolar is a whole different ballgame from what causes my issues. The whole chemical imbalance thing, I've heard that before. I think you're right about having to take meds in this case but again, I am not claiming to be an expert in this.

[whyzee]

wow ditchmud, that is EXACTLY my story. like you, every couple of years after feeling normal i will stop taking my medication. within a few months i am just about unable to focus and produce at work ( i frame houses )..I will let an 1/8" of something being out of level or plumb keep me up for 2 -3 nights in a row until I finally rip it down and start over until it is perfect....which it really never is .lol...the crappy lumber you get today 1 out of 4 studs is perfect. Anyway, its not very productive or good for anybody. that is me off my meds.
so its a terrible cycle and common for males who are bi polar to constantly stop thier meds once they are feeling normal. I despise taking them, but when I start the downward spiral and hit bottom. I thank God they are available to us or they would simply lock us up.
It's very hard to talk to people about this. Its not something you are going to bring up on Facebook and talk about even though you know there are some of your friends who also suffer. The privacy offered here on 3WW might allow people who suffer, actually talk about it, after all we certainly share a common passion for the unusual or unaccepted three wheelers.
Thanks guys for opening up.
Chris

[YAMAHA_Jim]

Sry to hear you cant race mx anymore.
I took antidepressants(lexapro) in 03 and 08 for about 3 months.I never felt so sick in my life,vomit diarrhea and constant nautious feeling in my gut.Being a heavy equip operator my Dr. told me the reason I was depressed is b/c I dig myself into a hole everyday :) The pills took the depression away in about 3 wks and it came back about 3 wks after I stopped the pills.I've learned to be content with where I'm at and what I've got.I think talking to someone that understands what depression is is sometimes the best help,more so a family member or friend,Docs just want to give you pills and go see thier next patient. Good Luck!We are here for you.

[YAMAHA_Jim]

shh,,my bipolarness is a secret,I like going into uncontrolled rages once in awhile.I have improved over the years,I no longer beat the heck out of inanimate objects until both hands are dripping blood.I used to call that transferance of feelings :) inanimate objects cant press charges on you,clean record,no arrests for anything,yet. Well i feel better now that I got that out there :)

[briano]

I'm going to go to my parents house on Saturday to see if we can talk. Yes there is more to the story, kind of a history so to speak. Not with my parents but my grandparents on my moms side, I don't want to get into it. I just want my daughter to grow up with my mom and dad around.
To help out with my issues I like to jump on my wheeler and go rip around to blow off steam, but I have my daughter after work now so being with her helps me. Just to see the smile on her face when "daddy" picks her up. My fiancé works afternoon shift and I am days so I get to be with my baby for about 4 to 5 hours everyday during the week.

[Howdy]

I think everyone goes threw this at one time or another. Some can admit it, some can't.
Howdy

[mohadib]

I have severe arthritis. It seems it's on more often than off now days. During those times it's really hard to do anything. The pain is one thing, but the mental beat down is just as bad. It was so bad this winter I thought I was dying lol. Thought my GF was going to leave me, almost ruined my business too. The spring came just in time, the arthritis always seems to be better in the spring/summer. Sometimes there is no snapping out of a depression. No amount of sunlight or good food can fix everything. Not sure how someone could deal with that nonstop for an entire lifetime. Anyway, I don't have insurance, havent for years. So I have not been going to the rheumatologist like I should. After this winter though, I decided to stop procrastinating and deal with this stuff now. So I got an appointment on the 25th of this month..costing me $495 just to walk in! Still a small price to pay...

[Mr_RPM]

I have a problem. I recently went to the doctor about it and im trying a new medication now. I am having a really hard time growing up in lamest terms. I get extremely high anxiety when i need to be responsible. if the bank calls, car insurance problem ect... i freak out. i cannot talk to strangers on the phone. even with friends im all about texting because i have to much anxiety to have a phone call. i dont have much of a problem with strangers but its just either when its on the phone or if its something important. I am 19 and still have my mom and dad help me alot. i had a problem with my jeep and needed to call the dealer i bought it from for some warranty work. i made my dad call...

I work things up in my head like its going to be alot worse then it really will be. i make everything difficult and impossible before i even do them. i have very low confidence. I also have anxiety when going somewhere i have never been before. i hate going to a friends house that i have never been to before. i have a disability and i need to wear my shoes indoors. well i will ditch people just so i don't have to tell them i cant take off my shoes in their house. i always worry they will have a big star case with no railing for me to hold on to, my disability gives me anxiety when going to new environments. I use my disability as a huge anxiety maker as for getting a job. i cant walk or stand much and now im having a hard time trying to get a job. i have never had a job, i hate talking to people, i hate new environments, im afraid to run into something i can't do because of my disability. all of these are included on getting a job. getting ready to go to an interview would be the end of the world for me with nerves and anxiety.

I overall don't feel ready to grow up. I have a confidence problem and have never had a girlfriend at the age of 19. i talk to alot of women but have so much self doubt that i can never be more then their friend. i know it would be a big help now if i was doing something with my life. women want a m an whos going somewhere and is successful but what i want more then anything is to have a real relationship with a girl and do the whole "love" thing first. but i know its not gonna happen till i get off my sorry ass and trailprotrailprotrailprotrailprotrailprotrailprotr ailpro do something. lol

idk I have problems and its starting to control my life. so i am now taking medication and im going to see if it will give me what it takes to start my life and grow up.

[atc007]

shh,,my bipolarness is a secret,I like going into uncontrolled rages once in awhile.I have improved over the years,I no longer beat the heck out of inanimate objects until both hands are dripping blood.I used to call that transferance of feelings :) inanimate objects cant press charges on you,clean record,no arrests for anything,yet. Well i feel better now that I got that out there :)

Some thread huh guys! And you thought you were alone YZ ? Wanna know how many are seeing this and WON"T post? A lot. Jim,,our son came to us when he was 12,,{ we adopted him }same ol long story. Druggie Mom,Abusive Dad,witness protection program,,the whole Nine. He single handedly beat the boards off our barn. Right hand mostly.. For YEARS. Star wrestler in school. Headed for States his senior year. Punches the gym wall @ school over his gf. Breaks his hand. Lies to us and the DR. about it. Just didn't want to admit he still did it. We thought he was over it in his Junior year. Fast forward a year,not listening to the rules here. Moves out ,gets a job @ a butcher plant. They have him living @ physical therapy,and trying to push the drugs. Well, he did the therapy,but like me won't put any chemicals in his body unless it's a last resort. He lasted 4 months before they had to do surgery. His right hand is SHOT @ 19. Now,just last week he's moved out over a simple stupid thing. Temper/ unable to sort thru things logically. It kills me. In laws saying I " kicked" them out... Yeah right! I wouldn't turn my back on my kids! Anyhow,obviously Jim,,your hands dripping story struck a nerve. I have a finished empty basement if you wanna get away the weekend of that rally. Open invite. Your call. Bill

[atc007]

I'm going to go to my parents house on Saturday to see if we can talk. Yes there is more to the story, kind of a history so to speak. Not with my parents but my grandparents on my moms side, I don't want to get into it. I just want my daughter to grow up with my mom and dad around.
To help out with my issues I like to jump on my wheeler and go rip around to blow off steam, but I have my daughter after work now so being with her helps me. Just to see the smile on her face when "daddy" picks her up. My fiancé works afternoon shift and I am days so I get to be with my baby for about 4 to 5 hours everyday during the week.

Whatever happens with them is their call. YOU have all your stuff TOGETHER. Family is all that matters. YOU know that ,it is obvious how you feel for that little girl,and that YOU are putting forth the effort to get your Mom and Dad on board. If they don't respond it is Their problem. Enjoy the heck out of your little girl and your wife,and let the other cards fall where they will. You are obviously doing all that you can.

[atc007]

I have severe arthritis. It seems it's on more often than off now days. During those times it's really hard to do anything. The pain is one thing, but the mental beat down is just as bad. It was so bad this winter I thought I was dying lol. Thought my GF was going to leave me, almost ruined my business too. The spring came just in time, the arthritis always seems to be better in the spring/summer. Sometimes there is no snapping out of a depression. No amount of sunlight or good food can fix everything. Not sure how someone could deal with that nonstop for an entire lifetime. Anyway, I don't have insurance, havent for years. So I have not been going to the rheumatologist like I should. After this winter though, I decided to stop procrastinating and deal with this stuff now. So I got an appointment on the 25th of this month..costing me $495 just to walk in! Still a small price to pay...

Sounds like you DO need insurance! Really hope everything works out god for you... Have you tried a juice diet for a cpl weeks. Watch this movie please,try it. What do you have to lose,,,other than the swelling in your joints. Might work?

http://www.hulu.com/watch/289122/fat-sick-and-nearly-dead

[atc007]

I have a problem. I recently went to the doctor about it and im trying a new medication now. I am having a really hard time growing up in lamest terms. I get extremely high anxiety when i need to be responsible. if the bank calls, car insurance problem ect... i freak out. i cannot talk to strangers on the phone. even with friends im all about texting because i have to much anxiety to have a phone call. i dont have much of a problem with strangers but its just either when its on the phone or if its something important. I am 19 and still have my mom and dad help me alot. i had a problem with my jeep and needed to call the dealer i bought it from for some warranty work. i made my dad call...

I work things up in my head like its going to be alot worse then it really will be. i make everything difficult and impossible before i even do them. i have very low confidence. I also have anxiety when going somewhere i have never been before. i hate going to a friends house that i have never been to before. i have a disability and i need to wear my shoes indoors. well i will ditch people just so i don't have to tell them i cant take off my shoes in their house. i always worry they will have a big star case with no railing for me to hold on to, my disability gives me anxiety when going to new environments. I use my disability as a huge anxiety maker as for getting a job. i cant walk or stand much and now im having a hard time trying to get a job. i have never had a job, i hate talking to people, i hate new environments, im afraid to run into something i can't do because of my disability. all of these are included on getting a job. getting ready to go to an interview would be the end of the world for me with nerves and anxiety.

I overall don't feel ready to grow up. I have a confidence problem and have never had a girlfriend at the age of 19. i talk to alot of women but have so much self doubt that i can never be more then their friend. i know it would be a big help now if i was doing something with my life. women want a m an whos going somewhere and is successful but what i want more then anything is to have a real relationship with a girl and do the whole "love" thing first. but i know its not gonna happen till i get off my sorry ass and trailprotrailprotrailprotrailprotrailprotrailprotr ailpro do something. lol

idk I have problems and its starting to control my life. so i am now taking medication and im going to see if it will give me what it takes to start my life and grow up.

Well friend,,as you know, my wife and 2 of my daughters have the Muscular Dystrophy also. My brother is mentally and physically challenged. He too has to wear AFO's and lift shoes. We live in the country,and so do Most of our family/friends. So,,our shoes aren't pavement clean! Around 3WW,we all know you have mad talent. How many of your friends could have built that Gorgeous 110 in their basement? How many? Thought so. You have some great talent,attention to detail,and work ethic. That machine didn't build itself, I bet you keep your Jeep as nice as you can too? I know it's easy for me to say,but don't worry about the rest. You are you. Everyone has their struggles. If you see someone who you think has it all together,,they don't. It's human. We are constantly dealing w some sort of crap! ANY friend or acquaintance that cares about your shoes or gate,isn't a friend worth having. It is unfortunately that simple! There are some things we control. The things we CAN"T,,we shouldn't worry about. That simple. People will be more than willing to accept and /if need be/help you once you get out there. I promise. The ones that don't,,,are probably too shy not too. They might not necessarily be bad. As far as a job. Do what you love. Period,life is too dam short to be somewhere you don't want to be. If that means college? Get a student loan. I'm totally against borrowing money myself,,but if you're going to. YOU is def the Best thing you can invest in. Lady wise?? haha,,THAT will come all on it's own ,,when and where fate decides!! And once it does? You may be missing the Good old single days!!! The harder you look for it,the further away it seems. I had a friend who was 30,,down on his luck,I'm NEVER gonna find a girl,,blah,blah.. Now he's married,they just moved into their own mortgaged home,,new truck,new quad..And wishing for it, is all a memory. And at 19,,you're not supposed to be grown up!!!!! 27 maybe! Easy for me to say maybe,but you're putting to much pressure on yourself! Lighten up,get out there and live a little. Noones gonna bite. And no matter how uncomfortable you get,,,you can always just go home, and get out and ride :D

[yooperman]

fabio you have some good advice, i know excactly what your talking about with the docs pushing pills on people. the worse ones were the VA docs, when when I got back from Iraq they tried shoving hand full of pills down my throat i took them for a little bit but i was always on cloud nine and said enough of this crap and stopped taking them because i felt like a pharmacy with all the pills they had me taking. Now i just go at it head first a nd grab the bull by the horns, i still have bad days with everything but now i just becaome like an ol peterbuilt i keep trucking because my wife and kid are what keeps me trucking.

i use to always think this emotional/mental issues were a wishy washy kind of thing because i never had it before i deployed because i was always a go with the flow type of guy. now i understand everything now. and good luck to every one who suffers it aint an easy road to make it down just keep on trucking.

[Mr_RPM]

Well friend,,as you know, my wife and 2 of my daughters have the Muscular Dystrophy also. My brother is mentally and physically challenged. He too has to wear AFO's and lift shoes. We live in the country,and so do Most of our family/friends. So,,our shoes aren't pavement clean! Around 3WW,we all know you have mad talent. How many of your friends could have built that Gorgeous 110 in their basement? How many? Thought so. You have some great talent,attention to detail,and work ethic. That machine didn't build itself, I bet you keep your Jeep as nice as you can too? I know it's easy for me to say,but don't worry about the rest. You are you. Everyone has their struggles. If you see someone who you think has it all together,,they don't. It's human. We are constantly dealing w some sort of crap! ANY friend or acquaintance that cares about your shoes or gate,isn't a friend worth having. It is unfortunately that simple! There are some things we control. The things we CAN"T,,we shouldn't worry about. That simple. People will be more than willing to accept and /if need be/help you once you get out there. I promise. The ones that don't,,,are probably too shy not too. They might not necessarily be bad. As far as a job. Do what you love. Period,life is too dam short to be somewhere you don't want to be. If that means college? Get a student loan. I'm totally against borrowing money myself,,but if you're going to. YOU is def the Best thing you can invest in. Lady wise?? haha,,THAT will come all on it's own ,,when and where fate decides!! And once it does? You may be missing the Good old single days!!! The harder you look for it,the further away it seems. I had a friend who was 30,,down on his luck,I'm NEVER gonna find a girl,,blah,blah.. Now he's married,they just moved into their own mortgaged home,,new truck,new quad..And wishing for it, is all a memory. And at 19,,you're not supposed to be grown up!!!!! 27 maybe! Easy for me to say maybe,but you're putting to much pressure on yourself! Lighten up,get out there and live a little. Noones gonna bite. And no matter how uncomfortable you get,,,you can always just go home, and get out and ride :D


Thanks for your kind words! I'm not too worried about life yet. Im just starting to feel pressure from so manny different things. I need to just figure out what I want to do with my life and what type of career I want to pursue and then take 1 step at a time.
I am starting to realize how much no one has a clue what they are doing. I will get looks from peers when i tell them im not in school and im not really doing anything right now. Then ill ask them what they are up to and its almost always something they don't want to do and its all because they were pressured into it earlier.
the difference for me is Im not going to get pressured into something i don't want. I still need to find out what my passions are and find out a way to make a life out of it. I know I will live a happy satisfying life I just sometimes get overwhelmed.

Unrelated to my last bit but to the topic of the thread, I have alot of anxiety over society and how stupidly complex it is. if you want to do anything it will revolve around some long process of crap. let say I want a job. well most people have to either work their way up or go to school. I can't start out at mcdonalds or pushing carts at walmart because of my disability. so when I go to autozone to get a job as a parts guy they want a resume. well I have nothing to put on it, no job experience to build off of. I never got a chance to do that first step. working on a farm as a boy, washing cars at the car wash, mowing lawns, nothing giving me credit as a base to build up from. so my 2nd choice is school, but i don't want to start school not knowing what I want to do. if i go to start my basic classes without a long term goal i will get lazy and unmotivated. I need to find out what to go into school for first and thats where I am stuck now. Maybe I want to go into a tech school? idk
I often wish I had the simplicity of taking over a family business like many can do. to already have something lined up and all i gotta do is go with it would be awesome. my buddy is working at his grandfathers gun shop and will probably own it one day. I want to be able to work with my grandfather and slowly work up the skills to do it myself.

something I also have anxiety about is the law and police, I have an irrational fear of police. 2 years ago I was being a dumb arse kid and was drinking at a party. well i left and was driving home even though I should not have been. on my way home I was pulled over for a head light out. it was my first and only time ever being pulled over. well i he smelled it, i blew a .07 which is too high for a minor (freshly 18) and I was taken off to jail. I had to do the whole probation thing and had to pay every bit of cash I had saved up. my 1 and only encounter with police was very negative and has given me this fear of them. its more of being very anxious around them. i feel like Im a beat dog and when my new owner tries to pet me i flinch. I don't do anything illegal and have no reason to be afraid, but i just am.

I often joke and wish I could just go live in the woods away from society. live like a doomsday prepper out in a hidden shelter with my 3 wheelers and jeep. living a simple life with little stress from the complexities of modern day society.

well hopefully my medication will give me the slight jump I need to get out of this rut and start my journey of life.

[Slingblade]

Thanks to all of you who served, and thanks for your post, Fabio. Some really good, real world advice.

I also fight depression. My father was thought to be an undiagnosed manic depressant. He ultimately committed suicide at age 27, when I was 7 years old. I never really even knew him.

I don't even really know if it's hereditary, but sometimes I feel as if I'm fighting some of his demons. I did visit the doc at one of the lowest times of my life. I tried the meds a while, but quit.

It makes me mad that I have to take a pill for friggin Acid Reflux. Nothing against medicine, I just don't want to be dependant on a mind altering substance unless it's absolutely nessasary

I've never turned to drugs or alcohol as my father did. I've learned to fight against myself, if I'm battling depression what I really want to do is be alone, but what I really NEED is to be around someone positive.

Like someone already said ,we all go through things in life. It makes me feel better knowing I'm not the only one. It's really strange that I admit stuff on here that I won't elsewhere.

Makes me think I need to get my ipad and lay on the couch while I post.

[Mr_RPM]

It's really strange that I admit stuff on here that I won't elsewhere.


Its an easy place to do it. I can hide behind the computer screen and say things to real people without anyone from real life knowing. A place I can say things and then escape it all with a click. I really like you guys on 3ww, we are a small sub culture of what i feel like are good real people. so i choose 3ww as my safe place to talk. i don't even post much about trikes these days, but im still here everyday because of the people.

[fabiodriven]

I have a confidence problem and have never had a girlfriend at the age of 19. i talk to alot of women but have so much self doubt that i can never be more then their friend. i know it would be a big help now if i was doing something with my life. women want a m an whos going somewhere and is successful but what i want more then anything is to have a real relationship with a girl and do the whole "love" thing first. but i know its not gonna happen till i get off my sorry ass and trailprotrailprotrailprotrailprotrailprotrailprotr ailpro do something. lol

This is something else I can speak to.

I was a particularly ugly and insecure teenager (hence the name Fabio, it started as sarcasm) and I didn't get my first kiss from a girl until I was 19. Let me just tell you RPM, you have plenty of time. If I could show you some of the dames I've been with and the filthy porn-star things I've done with them, let's just say you have a lot to look forward to. I'm just an average looking skinny dude too. I'm no body builder and I didn't play sports when I was a kid. Just an honest gear-head who calls 'em like I sees 'em, but I have a thing for beautiful women. My buddies were always on my case growing up and would tell me I'd never land a girl like the ones I wanted. Not only can I do it, I do do it. The proof is in the pudding. I consistently have the nicest looking broad of the group. You can do it too, you'll see buddy.;)

[Cave Rider]

All that I can say is your not alone, however do not EVER be too proud to ask for help. Fabio has made some very good points, as well as others. keep your head high, and don't let people bring you down, as some will do it just for their own pleasure.

[atc007]

Mr Rpm. I know what you mean about " society" ,,just the way it is. Getting a CDL,,you can't drive without it,,you can't get it without experience? Wtf,,,yet there's truckers everywhere. Try getting a Motorcycle shop going!!!!!!!!! I swear to God,,,you need everything except a note from the Pope and letter from the President. You wouldn't believe it! Anyhow,,You've got your head on straight. You are gonna be fine. The fact that you know you're not gonna do what you don't want and you know you're going to be happy is 95% of the battle. I had to laugh what you said. I VERY often think,and sometimes say,,,I'm going back in the woods to live! The difference being,,I could. And would. No electric,communication or conveniences. Would actually embrace it. I was born in the wrong Century..Sounds like you met some of the " Prick" cops. They suck.. there are good ones too. BKM on here. There is an example. They are human too,no need to fear them. Sorry your experience sucked. My buddy,,who we are NOT getting into!!!!! Lets just say ,,I have a friend in a VERY low place : D . He laughs and gets along w the Staties just fine,,usually. ..

[whyzee]

Wow guys. I knew I wasn't alone but I am amazed at how many if you have taken the time and the nerve and admit anything to do with an illness that most people can't even see. So many of you guys have reached out and shared your personal situation.
Its really hard to admit there is something not quite " right "about your mental stability. I still live in denial when I am feeling better and actually argue with my doctor about taking medicine. She then pulls out my sheets of all the crazy trailprotrailprotrailprotrailpro I did when I was manic, and the weeks I would stay in bed and literally stare at the cieling. I'm not kidding. Its hard but I have so many other attributes that I am grateful for. Please don't take this thread as me complaining about my life.
The point of this thread is to help myself and everyone else who suffers from this affliction to try and learn as much about it as possible from our online community, and to talk to those who suffer or have suffered by living with or being married to someone bipolar. Its not pretty. I have the most understanding family and wife you could ever ask for but I know they are at their breaking point. I needed some support from people who are in a way , are like me. Lets face it, its pretty odd that most of us are grown men and still own and ride 3 wheelers or young kids who own 3 wheelers ( at least that's what people tell me.)
Thanks guys for opening up, thank you to everyone who has offered help, given advice and basically thier innermost secret with the rest of this great community.
Thank you guys!

[whyzee]

Some thread huh guys! And you thought you were alone YZ ? Wanna know how many are seeing this and WON"T post? A lot. Jim,,our son came to us when he was 12,,{ we adopted him }same ol long story. Druggie Mom,Abusive Dad,witness protection program,,the whole Nine. He single handedly beat the boards off our barn. Right hand mostly.. For YEARS. Star wrestler in school. Headed for States his senior year. Punches the gym wall @ school over his gf. Breaks his hand. Lies to us and the DR. about it. Just didn't want to admit he still did it. We thought he was over it in his Junior year. Fast forward a year,not listening to the rules here. Moves out ,gets a job @ a butcher plant. They have him living @ physical therapy,and trying to push the drugs. Well, he did the therapy,but like me won't put any chemicals in his body unless it's a last resort. He lasted 4 months before they had to do surgery. His right hand is SHOT @ 19. Now,just last week he's moved out over a simple stupid thing. Temper/ unable to sort thru things logically. It kills me. In laws saying I " kicked" them out... Yeah right! I wouldn't turn my back on my kids! Anyhow,obviously Jim,,your hands dripping story struck a nerve. I have a finished empty basement if you wanna get away the weekend of that rally. Open invite. Your call. Bill


Cant thank you enough Bill for your support in this matter. You guys are great !
Getting away for the weekend sounds great but it might dump even more stress on my wife having to run the family alone...but hell who knows , she certainly cant stand being with me the way I am now.

Slingblade , I am so sorry about losing your Dad. It sucks at any age , but in your situation it breaks my heart.
Dcreel, you are a cool cat. Thanks for the talk.

[whyzee]

Hey Bill,
I can see with almost 1000 views in 3 days that I am not alone and certainly have no shortage of support from you guys. Thank You !

[dcreel]

Having been in a hole myself several times on this journey we call life, and having lost quite a few friends due to suicide and depression. I'd rather stay up all night and talk to someone then lose another. That goes for anyone on the site, whether I know you or not.

Life is more often than not a motherf**ker.. It's learning or finding the ways to cope with it that keep us alive in the long run. Be that prescription drugs or what have you. During the 4 weeks I was locked up in a mental hospital as a teenager I learned to "fix" what was going on in my head.. so I could go home.. lol Life hasn't gotten a whole lot easier but I now know what I need to do to keep myself from succumbing to what is going on in my head. A stable marriage (3rd times a charm) with someone who loves me as much as I love and respect them is such a huge step for me. That made things so much easier day to day. My wife had a daughter when we met so having Allison with us for the past 6 years has filled a hole in my heart that the loss of my children has caused. Divorce and losing custody of my children has been the absolute worst thing I have ever had to endure..

My wife will probably never see this.. but, Thank you Kendra.

[atc007]

^^^I don't see the ' LOVE " this post button.^^^ YZ, you're always welcome here,,you know that! But I was talking to Jim ,lol,,, cool beans,,you made me laugh! You guys are awesome. Doug said it best.. Life is Tough. That is just the way it is. No two ways around it. But again,,here,we are talking about demons that noone should have to deal with ,,and that I haven't had in my head. But i have helped too many with it,it's very personal to me. The older I get,the more miles under the belt if you will. The more I see how it Drives our communities. It is so widespread. Our foster care training has opened some very wide doors,and rightfully so. We have had a lot of eye opening classes. But again,,I am on the outside looking in,trying to help. And it is not usually fun! As you all know.. lol

[mohadib]

Thanks for the input atc007. I have disabled flash because it keeps locking up my computer. I'll check that video out on the GFs computer this weekend.

[atc007]

It MAY change your life,,no joke. Give it 3 weeks..

[mohadib]

After this winter, I'd drink bear piss for 3 weeks if i thought it would help!

[atc007]

Can't wait to hear your results if you take the plunge!

[aldochina]

i have never had any expierience with mental heath issues personally, but over the last year my father has become severely depressed, his alcholism has gotton very bad, and he has recently talked about not wanting to live!! he has a large wonderful supportive family, but my mom just bounced after 35 yrs about 6 months ago, and the guy just cant deal!! they have had a miserable volitile relationship for atleast 10 yrs, so its hard for me to understand! I also live right next to the guy, so its been extremely hard on me and my wife personally. He has detoxed 6 times in 9 months, but as soon as he is home it starts in a matter of days. He is now in county jail after doing something very stupid a few days ago! he will not seek mental help volantarily, i am hoping they mandate something! I have a wonderful life with beatiful children, and a great wife, and i am miserable lately because of all that has transpired this past yr and a half, i could right a book!! I fear i am gonna need the mental help soon!!
I love what you said Fab!! makes me sick!! lotta slime out there that could care less about a patients health!! Its all about the $$! That being said, there are still some good ones out there! just way to few and far between! thanks for listening!!

[atc007]

That really sucks Rory, Sorry to hear all of that. And next door ,,SHOULD be the greatest gift in the world...but the opposite when it's like this. And if you have siblings,,,YOU are gonna bare 90% of it.. I KNOW how that works!! Hope he gets some help FAST !

[tri again]

It MAY change your life,,no joke. Give it 3 weeks..


Jeeze, I just stopped to check in before sleep and here's this new thread.
Not an easy fix topic I was looking for like a clutch or carb adjustment.

Winter was tough on everyone. Vitamin D is considered epidemically low because of
the low sunshine.
Detoxing from normal everyday things is important. Green juice fasts are pretty safe
and juicers are pretty cheap, especially people selling the ones they got for Christmas.

I usually burn out one or 2 a year. Keep one outside by the garden and clean it with a hose when I'm done
instead of messing up the kitchen.
I even have an extra regular old washing machine outside for washing veges.
The big toxins that we all see are partially hydrogenated oils in almost every food there is.
Oxygen free radical source that want to oxidize everything, including the insulation on our nerve cells.
High fructose corn sugar is the heroine of the sugar world.
It does NOT trigger the body to produce insulin so you can get saturated with this poison sugar and not even know it. except for the highs and lows in energy or insomnia, fatigue and everything else under the sun.
Tylenol, THE number one cause of liver failure in the USA is in almost every over the counter medication. Plain ol' blood toxins build up and it's like going through life with a low level, never ending hangover.
Milk thistle is a cheap vitamin good for liver support.

NOT to make anyone more depressed, but those are the big 3 and easily avoided.
EDIT: sorry I forgot my all time favorite. Aspartame of the diet soda fame, can turn to formaldehyde at room temperature.What's body temperature? Their response? Who drinks warm soda?
Major implications from seizures to just strange (undiagnosable) neurology.

Blood and urine tests from a doctors office can be hundreds of dollars but the real cost that the testing labs charge is around 30 bucks.
There is probably some sort of volunteers in medicine
or rock medicine, like the haight ashbury free clinic type places that love to help as cheaply as possible or free.

I'll go to 12 step meetings of whatever flavor I can find.
alanon, aa, na, coda etc once in a while just to get a balance point of what everyone else is going through.
They are free, anonymous and almost everywhere.
I also found that the state lottery pays for counseling that is family and relationship oriented and all you need to do is buy one ticket that you should've spend on dogfood or bills.
They NEED to help people to keep their grant money coming in and to actually help people who are struggling.

Wish I had more time to devote to this but yeah, depression and anxiety are 20th century luxuries. Gone are the days when all we needed was food, clothing and shelter.
so we have to fight back with the best information we can find with the tons and tons of challenges we all face every day.

I used to get panic attacks so bad I thought I was really gonna simply explode and die.
Why?
Good job, nice place to live, $$ in the bank, great family and support relationships, friends hobbies etc etc
and I'd get hit like a freight train.
Almost thought I was psychic and would write down the date and time in case I 'felt' some disaster on the other side of the world, like an earthquake or something had just taken place.

I wonder if it was the juicing that changed it all since they seem to be related.
hmmmmmm.
Of course, then I wonder about pesticides in the produce, so home grown or certified organic
makes sense.
The amount of environmental estrogens is also getting absurd.
It's in pesticides and fertilizers and all kinds of stuff
but I'd really rather give people, myself included, LESS to worry about, than add more to the pile.

One of the best things I heard from counselors was the fact that
generally, unhappy couples disagree on like 90% of issues and topics AND
Happy couples disagree on like 90% of issues and topics.

The difference? How they deal with them.

I'm not saying that any of this is easy or trite, but there are resources and help out there.

Someone once said that no matter what we're going through or just how special and hopeless we feel,
Millions of people have felt this way before and someone, somewhere has bothered to figure it out.

Best of luck to all of us, and thanks whyzee, for mentioning this topic.

[fabiodriven]

Unrelated to my last bit but to the topic of the thread, I have alot of anxiety over society and how stupidly complex it is. if you want to do anything it will revolve around some long process of crap. let say I want a job. well most people have to either work their way up or go to school. I can't start out at mcdonalds or pushing carts at walmart because of my disability. so when I go to autozone to get a job as a parts guy they want a resume. well I have nothing to put on it, no job experience to build off of. I never got a chance to do that first step. working on a farm as a boy, washing cars at the car wash, mowing lawns, nothing giving me credit as a base to build up from. so my 2nd choice is school, but i don't want to start school not knowing what I want to do. if i go to start my basic classes without a long term goal i will get lazy and unmotivated. I need to find out what to go into school for first and thats where I am stuck now. Maybe I want to go into a tech school? idk
I often wish I had the simplicity of taking over a family business like many can do. to already have something lined up and all i gotta do is go with it would be awesome. my buddy is working at his grandfathers gun shop and will probably own it one day. I want to be able to work with my grandfather and slowly work up the skills to do it myself.

You'll find your way RPM. I never graduated high school, joined the army when I was 19 or 20, got my CDL when I was 21, and now I do better than most of my friends who went to college. Not to mention I don't have any big college debts to pay off. I'm not saying that formula works for everyone, but set your goals and work on em, that's all. I know what you're talking about when it comes to having a family business passed down to you. I've known I wanted to be a truck driver since I was a kid. One of my buddy's family had a trucking outfit growing up and he had a truck lined up for him years before he was old enough to grind gears. I wished I had that when I was a kid, but I made my way behind the wheel regardless.

[dcreel]

but the only thing I could think about the whole way home was just going as fast as I could and hitting the biggest thing I saw. I just don't know what to do right now.

You need to talk to someone, professional or otherwise to get you some help.. There are helplines to call that can connect you with help or call a therapist from your yellow pages. Find one you feel comfortable with. Talk to someone about what is going on in your life. It's free.. Nobody really talks anymore, I mean really talks about what is going on in the world.

You'd be surprised how much better you will feel if you just get it off of your chest.. Sometimes the load is just too much to bear.. You need help.

[whyzee]

Hey sooper doodie ,
you have already taken a huge step in trying to get better. You admitted to yourself something is wrong, and you posted on here asking for advice. The best suggestion I can offer is to go to the emergency room. You will instantly be surrounded by people who care and want nothing more than to help you. They know the stats on suicide and attempted suicides. They also know that in almost every single case they could have prevented that suicide had they been there. There are medicines to instanly help you through the crisis situation from which you feel there is no possible way out. Then you can just listen to what the Dr's have to say and just be honest with yourself. I am pretty much against medicine, I feel it is overprescribed, but I thank God they have it , because if they didn't I know I wouldn't be here right now. Some of us just need it plain and simple.

Don't do something permanant for the way you are temporarily feeling..even if it feels like forever since you felt good !!

PM me if you want to talk or just post on the board again. There are alot of great and understanding guys on here, they have seen first hand suicides and they would love to help.
Take care and keep us posted.
Is your screen name a play on Ford's super duty ?

[whyzee]

Can't wait to hear your results if you take the plunge!
Hey Bill , what is the plunge ?? I would drink bear piss for 3 weeks also if it helped ..lol
By the way I am feeling 1000% better today. Combination of talking with all you great guys and my RX.
I think I will go outside, enjoy the sunshine and take the 400EX for a nice long ride. The way I felt wednesday morning when I wrote this thread seems like ages ago..dam bipolar thing !

What a post tri again !
Thank You.

[whyzee]

Amazingly ironic quote that was posted on my Fbook page from U2...
" Walk In My Shoes. Suicide takes the lives of more young men in Ireland than road accidents.' Join Adam for Walk in My Shoes day on April 26th and support mental health services for young adults in Ireland."
wow !

[jays375]

Is there anything out there good for treatment of anxiety?About 7 years ago my health took a dump.I had a near perforated ulcer.My gallbladder is pretty plugged up,not enough to remove.Only need 8% more for that.Suffer from chronic gastritus.Had all kinds of tests,some performed wrong.Not much else was found in the end.In the middle of all of it my nerves took went to hell.Had near on panic attacks.This was also after the word "cancer" was mentioned.So then doctors said it was all a anxiety problem and tried medication.This was after I quit taking everything else I was on.Those things were bad,quit taking and haven't seen a doctor since.Some days I feel good others not so much.Used to be a very active person and now not so much.I just fell run down alot and seem to get sick pretty easy.My immune system isn't the best.Think I would be better if my nerves weren't so bad.Right now though I have no use for any doctor.They all stick up for each other even when one is wrong.Since everybody else seemed to come forward figured I would try it out.Haven't discussed this with anybody.

[whyzee]

glad you decided to post !
First I would ask you about your diet, and be honest. Caffiene intake, sugar, tobacco use, take advil regularly and your eating habits. Do you eat late night ? 4 or 5 small meals a day or 1-2 large ones.
Next you have to ask yourself how bad is your anxiety ? Can you preform your job properly ? Do you sleep well ? Are you constantly worried you have cancer everytime you feel a burn or pain in your stomach. Do you avoid social situations because you feel you might " lose it ". These are just the basic questions.
SInce you said you tried an rx for anxiety and they were awful , might just tell you that it's diet related. There are a few good natural anxiety relievers that nature has given us. Valerian Root , Kava Kava , melatonin to name a few. I do not know how safe these are compared to an rx for anxiety.
You say you feel like you may have a panic attack. Describe your panic and what you do about it, when does it happen, how often ?

[tulsamike3434]

I do that's all I'm gonna say !

[jays375]

Tried the diet thing.Basically three normal meals a day.One decaff coffee and soda a day.Drink either water or milk,no booze.One small bowel of ice cream at 9p.m..I do smoke one or two cigars a day,my bad.Basically suffer alot of indigestion,bloating,gas.Or my stomach feels completely empty,severly hungry.Avoid NSAIDs as much as possible.Avoid greasy,spicy foods.Only way to survive.I can go to work and do my job.If out of my comfort zone get very nervous.Will get very light headed,rapid breathing.Feels like I will pass out.Think my other wouldn't bother me as much if I could loose anxiety problem.

[tulsamike3434]

Mine is violent! very!

[whyzee]

Tried the diet thing.Basically three normal meals a day.One decaff coffee and soda a day.Drink either water or milk,no booze.One small bowel of ice cream at 9p.m..I do smoke one or two cigars a day,my bad.Basically suffer alot of indigestion,bloating,gas.Or my stomach feels completely empty,severly hungry.Avoid NSAIDs as much as possible.Avoid greasy,spicy foods.Only way to survive.I can go to work and do my job.If out of my comfort zone get very nervous.Will get very light headed,rapid breathing.Feels like I will pass out.Think my other wouldn't bother me as much if I could loose anxiety problem.

I know this may sound incredibly simple but really hard to do..I am willing to bet that if you completely remove that soda from you diet and replace it with a good aloe vera juice from a health food store your stomach issues might improve alot. Also , hate to say it but the cigars could be causing acid reflux and anxiety although some people feel the nicotine relaxes them.
However it really sounds like you need to have your gallbladder out. You might want to go for a second or third opinion .
As far as the anxiety , it could be from a rebound /sugar effect and the nicotine.
I will wait for " tri again " to chime in.

[atc007]

Gone all day guys .. YZ,the plunge I eluded to was Juicing. Watch that movie I linked. Then try it. I'm not saying it's easy,it's not. But it works! Supercharging your body with micronutrients. Sounds like EXACTLY ,to the T,, what you are needing Jays !!! Cleanses you,reduces internal swelling. Heals from the inside out. Again,,it's radical,but they now have a support forum,that is free. Reboot your life,it's called.

[whyzee]

Gone all day guys .. YZ,the plunge I eluded to was Juicing. Watch that movie I linked. Then try it. I'm not saying it's easy,it's not. But it works! Supercharging your body with micronutrients. Sounds like EXACTLY ,to the T,, what you are needing Jays !!! Cleanses you,reduces internal swelling. Heals from the inside out. Again,,it's radical,but they now have a support forum,that is free. Reboot your life,it's called.

I will definitly watch it tonight. Thanks Bill !

[whyzee]

Mine is violent! very!
do you just flip out and throw things or worse than that?
I've been known to throw tools across my yard and into the woods when an f'ing bolt snaps off or when my wife used to push my buttons. That was years ago though. I am alot better when it comes to flipping out.

[jays375]

Yeah I know the nicotine isn't any good.I went six years without any tobacco.Plus during the time no coffee at all or soda.Really didn't change things.They won't remove my gallbladder unless it is forty percent blocked or in a lot of pain.Last test showed I was at thirty two percent.There is another problem possible.Which nothing really can't be anything for.When they tested for that I wasn't prepped correctly for it.Didn't find out till after.The doctor was overwhelmed at the time and dropped me.Said she couldn't do anything for me.That one kinda of put me over the edge.Lost all faith in doctors at that point.

[tri again]

You need to talk to someone, professional or otherwise to get you some help.. There are helplines to call that can connect you with help or call a therapist from your yellow pages. Find one you feel comfortable with. Talk to someone about what is going on in your life. It's free.. Nobody really talks anymore, I mean really talks about what is going on in the world.

You'd be surprised how much better you will feel if you just get it off of your chest.. Sometimes the load is just too much to bear.. You need help.

x2

There are 24 hour crisis lines and the people are super nice that answer them.
Probably listed in the front pages of your phone book.
How do I know? I've called them before. NOT a sign of weakness.

They also have places to go or call during the day to get appointments and it's all confidential.

[El Camexican]

My brother and sister are both doctors. The stories I have heard about the tactics used by drug companies to move their products would likely make some narcos blush. Medicine is a business, a HUGE business and it is no less susceptible to corruption than any other money making enterprise. I could tell you stories about how faulty joint implants are dealt with that would shock you. What happens on golf courses and cocktail parties between doctors and pharmaceutical company reps is borderline criminal. What Flabio said about the pills rings true with a lot of people. They get hooked on legal meds and become walking zombies dependent on others to survive. I know plenty and have someone very close to me who deals with depression a lot. I’ve been fortunate in that my father was diagnosed with a high stress level and put on meds way back when Valium was the flavor of the day. He used the pills one week and tossed them. He then quit his high stress job and went to college at 40 years of age. Got a job doing what he liked doing and always made time to fish, hunt and garden afterwards. I’ve followed his path in that I seem to always have a job with an intense amount of responsibility and lots of hours and travel, but when my hands start shaking and I can hear the blood pumping through my ears like a hammer on a drum I know what is happening thanks to him explaining it to me. There are plenty of warning signs you get to know as well, like getting pi**ed-off easily, yelling at people for next to nothing, finding it hard to get out of bed in the morning, etc. If you learn the signs you can often deal with the problem before it becomes worse. I take some deep breaths to get past the initial onset then in the evening maybe pour a drink, light a stogie, go to the park with my daughter, or call an old friend. Sometimes it can take a few days of even weeks to clear up, but I’d much rather battle it with my mind and actions than with a pill. Unfortunately mankind’s environment has recently evolved at pace that many of us just can cope with and that can trigger a lot of primal defense mechanisms in the body and mind that would have been productive during a hunt, or fist to fist battle. 100 years ago anyone who sat on a couch all day and stressed would die of starvation, but today with fridges and gas heating, it is possible to sitting alone on a couch with the lights dimmed for days and weeks without doing much else. I think that looking for the positive in everything and reminding ourselves how much better we have it than almost everyone else on the planet is a great way to feel better. I’d never tell anyone not to see a doctor for a problem, but having recently suffered a bout with Steven Johnsons syndrome http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stevens%E2%80%93Johnson_syndrome (thank God it was mild) I would advise you all to do your own research when prescribed any meds and seek second and third opinions if possible. I saw three doctors before one figured out what was causing this. And for those of you seeking the help of a shrink, be sure to ask to see their diploma of sanity before taking their advice to seriously.

[whyzee]

My brother and sister are both doctors. The stories I have heard about the tactics used by drug companies to move their products would likely make some narcos blush. Medicine is a business, a HUGE business and it is no less susceptible to corruption than any other money making enterprise. I could tell you stories about how faulty joint implants are dealt with that would shock you. What happens on golf courses and cocktail parties between doctors and pharmaceutical company reps is borderline criminal. What Flabio said about the pills rings true with a lot of people. They get hooked on legal meds and become walking zombies dependent on others to survive. I know plenty and have someone very close to me who deals with depression a lot. I’ve been fortunate in that my father was diagnosed with a high stress level and put on meds way back when Valium was the flavor of the day. He used the pills one week and tossed them. He then quit his high stress job and went to college at 40 years of age. Got a job doing what he liked doing and always made time to fish, hunt and garden afterwards. I’ve followed his path in that I seem to always have a job with an intense amount of responsibility and lots of hours and travel, but when my hands start shaking and I can hear the blood pumping through my ears like a hammer on a drum I know what is happening thanks to him explaining it to me. There are plenty of warning signs you get to know as well, like getting pi**ed-off easily, yelling at people for next to nothing, finding it hard to get out of bed in the morning, etc. If you learn the signs you can often deal with the problem before it becomes worse. I take some deep breaths to get past the initial onset then in the evening maybe pour a drink, light a stogie, go to the park with my daughter, or call an old friend. Sometimes it can take a few days of even weeks to clear up, but I’d much rather battle it with my mind and actions than with a pill. Unfortunately mankind’s environment has recently evolved at pace that many of us just can cope with and that can trigger a lot of primal defense mechanisms in the body and mind that would have been productive during a hunt, or fist to fist battle. 100 years ago anyone who sat on a couch all day and stressed would die of starvation, but today with fridges and gas heating, it is possible to sitting alone on a couch with the lights dimmed for days and weeks without doing much else. I think that looking for the positive in everything and reminding ourselves how much better we have it than almost everyone else on the planet is a great way to feel better. I’d never tell anyone not to see a doctor for a problem, but having recently suffered a bout with Steven Johnsons syndrome http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stevens%E2%80%93Johnson_syndrome (thank God it was mild) I would advise you all to do your own research when prescribed any meds and seek second and third opinions if possible. I saw three doctors before one figured out what was causing this. And for those of you seeking the help of a shrink, be sure to ask to see their diploma of sanity before taking their advice to seriously.

Sorry about your SJS syndrome. Thank God they caught it in time. I can understand your weariness of meds and drug companies. It's a freaking huge business who's CEO and shareholders care more about the $$ than the people they give them to.
I agree with you 1000 % el camexican. on everything ! I think meds are overprescribed, probably 9 out of 10 times. I am just trying to bring to light the small percentage of us who doing all those things you say and it just doesn't work. It's like saying to a diabetic , if you just eat right and lose weight, you won't need insulin. Bi polar , true depression ( i am not talking about feeling down for a few weeks ) paralyzing anxiety, crazy manic episodes that may last for weeks or even months are true medical conditions. No amount of spending time with my beautiful daughters or beautiful wife in my nice home , enjoying a drink etc can help. I personally have done all of that. I have been fighting meds for a long long time. I will feel good for a few years, then stop for awhile, then I leave everyone around me to pick up the pieces. It sucks.
I wish I could enjoy a drink , or a cigar or even a cigarette, and have it help..Hell , who doesn't enjoy a cigarette, but after watching my Father die when I was 20 after a 2 year battle with lung cancer, it's something I promised my kids I would never put them through. But fighting severe depression on your own can have the same fatal results.
No pity party here, just wanted to help those talk about things and to learn how the heck the rest of you sane people do it.
Sometimes you just can't make it on your own.

[atc007]

I just want to take the time to publicly Thank you YZ. this took some balls on your part,and who knew!!! There's a LOT of views on this thread! I simply CANNOT Imagine what some of you have pulled thru. And will more than likely face again. You are tough as friggin nails just to be up and taking nutrition! And some people think THEY have problems! So cheers to you Chris for bringing this up. I have a hunch you have helped many you will never even know. I will differ from you calling some of us " sane".. I think to pull thru the episodes you and others have came thru takes WAY more power than any " sane" person could muster.

[whyzee]

I just want to take the time to publicly Thank you YZ. this took some balls on your part,and who knew!!! There's a LOT of views on this thread! I simply CANNOT Imagine what some of you have pulled thru. And will more than likely face again. You are tough as friggin nails just to be up and taking nutrition! And some people think THEY have problems! So cheers to you Chris for bringing this up. I have a hunch you have helped many you will never even know. I will differ from you calling some of us " sane".. I think to pull thru the episodes you and others have came thru takes WAY more power than any " sane" person could muster.

Thanks Bill. You have a gift of putting your thoughts into words !
Having been a member here for 6 years it's something I thought about alot. I even wrote this thread 3 times in the past , only to delete it before even posting it.
I really wish I would have done this sooner. The support from our community has been overwhelming.
Thank You Guys !

[Dirtcrasher]

Well, lets see; When did all hell break loose? I guess about 2 weeks into unemployment, which quickly turned to months, a year and longer. The TV was telling me how bad the economy was, I was bored, I drank more and got a DUI. When I realized that I could not drive for 3 years (I'm single) i was terrified; DEEPA was there to witness my meltdown; And Fabio a few days later. I don't borrow money, I don't like asking for favors but I like helping others as long as they appreciate it. I had no idea of how support myself.

So, I had a panic attack after I paid a lawyer and found out how little my nest egg was. The embarrassment, the humiliation which I caused by my own actions led to the 1st panic attack I have ever had. All I had was food stamps, some savings and a mother kind enough to take me to DUI classes, random testing, appearances and so on. I really wanted to put a bullet to my head for my actions, I should have been more responsible.

I got a bike and made a rack for repairs and rigged a ladder onto it so I could do repairs and clean gutters. Fortunately, I am near 750 homes in a closed gate housing area. I did the best I could and tried to get some work on the boards.

I went to see my doctor, I needed SOMETHING, ANYTHING and most of all I had to sleep. I have a 7 pill a day cocktail now and when situation changes, I will ween myself off them.

Then about 17 months into it, I met a great girl. She stuck it through while I waited for the DMV to give me a 12-12 license which I have now. She slowly backed off from me (maybe because she didn't want her family to learn what happened) but once again, I went back onto Wellbutrin, Klonopin and other meds to sleep.

Next, my dad goes to jail. Leaves 3 boxes on my porch of some tenant info and says "your all I have to run the business now". There was 900$ in the account and EVERYTHING was a patch job; I am cursed that I feel I should always do the best repair possible; And he was a hack of a hacks. BCredneck has nothing on my father :lol:

Some days are 9-9 and then I get home and pay the bills, answer the phone and make appointments; I have no time for me, I can't get hurt and it's ruining the last few years I have in me before my body doesn't want to moto on a trike any longer.

I do get some sleep but not always. Dads whole empire is crumbling down and just like I admitted my mistake, he has made his mistake but has much more to lose..... Fortunately I'm so busy I don't have the time to get upset. I just make a list of crap that has to be done for the week and do it the best I can.

I miss my friends, I miss getting a piece of *** , I miss my freedom and I miss the normalcy of the life I "use to have" These are the cards I'm dealt and all In can do is try to keep moving forwards. But, I'm sure my liver isn't too happy..........

We never know who's behind that keyboard unless they admit it.

Best wishes to all of you who go through divorce, custody battles, being cheated on and so forth. No one said "life will be easy"

[atc007]

Whew....and YOU GUYS IN THIS thread...are THE ones that always have gave when I collected......hmmmmmmm. I just keep learning! Thanx for sharing DC. Dam. You'll come out on top. I feel strongly about that! ...maybe you could hire Bcredneck to come down and tune things up for your tenants!!

[Dirtcrasher]

^ Thanks bud; We all have our issues, some are willing to spill their guts as I did.

And yes, any member that loses a family member should be recognized. I don't contribute to much other than people on the boards. I guess we can all have pissin contests but in the end, we all share the same passion :beer

[jays375]

Wow Steve!I surely appreciate that you do take the time and participate on this forum.Plus take the time to answer all my questions.I tried those meds and couldn't function or sleep.Tried sticking it out for a while too.Honestly I am at the point to try something again.My life sucks and luckily have somebody that stands by me.My only enjoyment is tinkering with my bike,trikes and yes my quad.What really sucks is how many of my socalled friends don't even come around.

[atc007]

I'm telling you Jay,,watch that movie.. Stick the fast out long enough to see a difference{ 3 weeks} ?? I think you'll be a new man. It aint easy,,but it is sure worth it!

[whyzee]

Wow DC..I simply cannot believe what life has thrown at you these last few years ! What is even more amazing is how hard you have fought back and fought the urge to take the easy way out..aka..eat a bullet. The fact that you mounted a rack to your bike to carry a ladder blows my mind. You have some incredible inner strength. SO what if you are on a med cocktail..your here with us fighting the fight and getting through it. I am happy your with us ..your liver will forgive you. So happy you went to see a Dr. there is nothing worse than not sleeping and being depressed.

crap gotta run
super doodie have fun at the supercross tonight, have a few beers if you drink and whatever you do , do not fight with your girlfriend no matter how hard it may be

jay. talk soon !

[Dirtcrasher]

Is there anything out there good for treatment of anxiety?About 7 years ago my health took a dump.I had a near perforated ulcer.My gallbladder is pretty plugged up,not enough to remove.Only need 8% more for that.Suffer from chronic gastritus.Had all kinds of tests,some performed wrong.Not much else was found in the end.In the middle of all of it my nerves took went to hell.Had near on panic attacks.This was also after the word "cancer" was mentioned.So then doctors said it was all a anxiety problem and tried medication.This was after I quit taking everything else I was on.Those things were bad,quit taking and haven't seen a doctor since.Some days I feel good others not so much.Used to be a very active person and now not so much.I just fell run down alot and seem to get sick pretty easy.My immune system isn't the best.Think I would be better if my nerves weren't so bad.Right now though I have no use for any doctor.They all stick up for each other even when one is wrong.Since everybody else seemed to come forward figured I would try it out.Haven't discussed this with anybody.

Sorry to hear your condition bud :( Some of us have demons every year others have the cards they are dealt with at birth. If your primary doctor is not helping you, find out who in your network will.

Around here(MA), everyone gets free care, just a bill that never goes away. I'm not advocating the system, it is what it is.

But, I believe you are quite a bit younger than some of us; So try and grab the bull by the horns NOW!! Take care, DC

[jays375]

Believe it or not really much younger,hit the big 4 0 in October.Did see other doctors but they all seemed to stick up for each other.Sad to say I just gave up and stumble through life these days.

[whyzee]

Believe it or not really much younger,hit the big 4 0 in October.Did see other doctors but they all seemed to stick up for each other.Sad to say I just gave up and stumble through life these days.
jays, when was the last time you went to see a Dr?
Are you suffering more from anxiety, depression or both? More importantly, can you sleep at night and do you wake up at a regular time everyday?
Do you work full time?

[atc007]

How's everyone doing? We had a completely unforecasted Noreaster here last night! It was supposed to "rain" lol,, 7 inches of blowing snow and ice,trees down everywhere,no electric for awhile{ 14 hours?] It's all good though. At least I'm gonna get a few miles in a sled this year after all!!!

[whyzee]

!^ we had a cold rain here. I'm glad it didn't snow. I'm doing good , as long as i take my " crazy " meds ,thanks for asking Bill.

[fabiodriven]

This video is slightly gay, I'm not gonna lie. And it's not EXACTLY on the topic we're discussing here. It does, however, pertain very heavily to the point I was trying to make.

Mind over matter ladies and gentlemen. Step one- Figure out what you want out of life. Step two- Go f*%king get it! Hoo-rah!!!

http://www.ebaumsworld.com/video/watch/82504721/

[1tonofsh!t]

My wife suffers from anxiety. Years ago she was diagnosed with hypothyroidism (too little hormones produced by thyroid). Doctors gave 2 options on removing thyroid, one was removing it surgically, other was swallowing a pill known as radio active iodine treatment. She chose the one I didn't like (we weren't married at the time and her mom persuaded her), the pill. Now she's on daily meds and gets checked every 6 months to make sure her levels (some chemical in the blood that correlates to hormones) are at the right level. For the last 3 months or more she has been overly anxious to the point where it freaks me out, so tomorrow she's going to see a new endocronologist.

I do my best to try and understand what she's going through, but its hard looking in from the outside. For instance last month we were in FL on vacation and she almost didn't get on the plane back home. Meanwhile she's flown enough to be used to it.

Hope this helps

[Vealmonkey]

Ok, time to fess up. I have depression. Tried to get meds for it at one time and the different meds made me more whacked out than the depression. I work a swing shift, meaning my shift changes every week, at best and sometimes my work hours change 2 or 3 times during the week!. Nothing is constant in my life, except for inconsistency. LOL I work anywhere from 8-16 hour shifts. Some weeks, I work 7 days a week. On one hand I shouldn't complain as many are jobless and I should count my blessing to be employed, but it is taking a toll on me physically and mentally. I'm paid well, but my work has caused my social life to suffer and my love life to be non-existant. Needless to say I'm single and luckily my pay takes care of my bills and my toys, which can have a tendency to pile up. It looks like I should be on "hoarders", but what happens is I buy things for my projects and then rarely have the time or the motivation to work on them anymore. Thank goodness for members on this board who are kind enough to help repair or build the things that I don't have the talent, tools or time for. Things are often cross the fine line of being overwhelming for me. My favorite rider 350x, I hadn't ridden in 2 years or so. I need to get rid of several machines for various reasons, too many, not enough room and I want to free up some dough to work on my new 57 chevrolet. Meds are meant for those that have chemical imbalances in their system, or so it seems to me. And there is no chemical imbalance for just a totally sucky situation. For all those who meds work for, I'm very glad and very jealous. If I could find a job making what I make now, I'd switch, and I haven't found a job making similar pay. I'd settle for just a 40 hour work week. Trust me, the overtime isn't at my suggestion. In the meantime, I just keep stashing away extra bank in the hopes of an early retirement someday. Oh, and did I tell you about my tinnitus? You know, that constant ringing in your ears that you have 24/7? It just adds to the goodness. LOL

[tulsamike3434]

do you just flip out and throw things or worse than that?
I've been known to throw tools across my yard and into the woods when an f'ing bolt snaps off or when my wife used to push my buttons. That was years ago though. I am alot better when it comes to flipping out.

i have bad anxiety from it.

[fabiodriven]

Ok, time to fess up. I have depression. Tried to get meds for it at one time and the different meds made me more whacked out than the depression. I work a swing shift, meaning my shift changes every week, at best and sometimes my work hours change 2 or 3 times during the week!. Nothing is constant in my life, except for inconsistency. LOL I work anywhere from 8-16 hour shifts. Some weeks, I work 7 days a week. On one hand I shouldn't complain as many are jobless and I should count my blessing to be employed, but it is taking a toll on me physically and mentally. I'm paid well, but my work has caused my social life to suffer and my love life to be non-existant. Needless to say I'm single and luckily my pay takes care of my bills and my toys, which can have a tendency to pile up. It looks like I should be on "hoarders", but what happens is I buy things for my projects and then rarely have the time or the motivation to work on them anymore. Thank goodness for members on this board who are kind enough to help repair or build the things that I don't have the talent, tools or time for. Things are often cross the fine line of being overwhelming for me. My favorite rider 350x, I hadn't ridden in 2 years or so. I need to get rid of several machines for various reasons, too many, not enough room and I want to free up some dough to work on my new 57 chevrolet. Meds are meant for those that have chemical imbalances in their system, or so it seems to me. And there is no chemical imbalance for just a totally sucky situation. For all those who meds work for, I'm very glad and very jealous. If I could find a job making what I make now, I'd switch, and I haven't found a job making similar pay. I'd settle for just a 40 hour work week. Trust me, the overtime isn't at my suggestion. In the meantime, I just keep stashing away extra bank in the hopes of an early retirement someday. Oh, and did I tell you about my tinnitus? You know, that constant ringing in your ears that you have 24/7? It just adds to the goodness. LOL

Pat, do me a favor and take a peek at my first post in this thread on page 1. You sound like a very good candidate for non-drug related healing. Exercise, yoga, diet, etc...

[Dirtcrasher]

I am OFFICIALLY off probation as of 3:00 today :D That ought to help my brain a little bit :lol:

[atc007]

Pat, do me a favor and take a peek at my first post in this thread on page 1. You sound like a very good candidate for non-drug related healing. Exercise, yoga, diet, etc...


The Dr has spoken.. Totally kidding Fabio,,,! Your advice here is awesome. Can't HURT anyone ! All good. Pat,,I've seen some of your posts over @ org,,,this doesn't surprise me!! lol,,I've said it before ,I'll say it again. I could NOT work swing shift,,you're asking too much of yourself. But I also see your long term plan paying off. Nobody has it perfect...I hope some balance finds it's way into your life. Now,I could type what's on my plate right now and some of you would be weeping!! It's all good. I hope everyone that has posted here,,and everyone who relates,but Won't post here ,is having a great day. And tomorrows even better!

[whyzee]

Thanks VealMonkey for sharing your situation. Fabio could be right on the money with trying diet , exercise etc.
The only thing that is troubling to me from a depression standpoint is the fact that you have not ridden your favorite bike in over 2 years. Is it because you are too busy or just lost interest in riding altogether ?
You seem to be funtioning well at work so that tells me your depression may not be serious enough to require medication. Believe me , when it comes to meds there is no magic bullet, unless its a short acting drug for acute anxiety eg. valium or xanax .
Talking about it really does help. Thanks for sharing.
BTW , had my worst anxiety attack in years last night for about 2 hours. I begged the wife to call 911...i was shaking, sweating , pounding heart, hyperventilating , numb face , hands, tunnel vison..the whole 9 yards. it was f'ing horrible. would not wish it on anyone. Fortunatly i was able to calm down but it took a full xanax to do so....usually i can take just a 1/4. i really feel bad for my wife, that i put her through this once again.

[Vealmonkey]

The swingshift I believe is the worst, than the long hours. It's really hard to have a realistic diet working different time schedules every week as there is no consistency in my life. And humans are generally creatures of habit. I didn't mention that when I sleep, it's generally no more than a 11/2 to 2 hour total time of sleep at a shot, unless I self medicate, which is bad. I think that if I could get 4 to 6 hours of straight sleep at a time would help with alot of things. I keep debating sleeping pills, which I hear they are non habit forming, but I'm pretty sure once I started, that I would pretty much become addicted to them if just for the fact that I would need them to get a decent stretch of sleep. And I'm slightly paranoid of taking some perscription pills as I'm single and live alone and if I have a problem...well, it just doesn't bode well with me being alone.

[whyzee]

Hey Pat sorry to hear of your hectic schedule.
lack of sleep , let alone proper sleep , can wreak havoc on your body. as you said we are creatures of habit. Do you feel you cant sleep because of your crazy schedule, or when you try to sleep your brain just wont shut off, racing thoughts etc ?
How much self medicating are we talking about ?

[bkm]

The swingshift I believe is the worst, than the long hours. It's really hard to have a realistic diet working different time schedules every week as there is no consistency in my life. And humans are generally creatures of habit. I didn't mention that when I sleep, it's generally no more than a 11/2 to 2 hour total time of sleep at a shot, unless I self medicate, which is bad. I think that if I could get 4 to 6 hours of straight sleep at a time would help with alot of things. I keep debating sleeping pills, which I hear they are non habit forming, but I'm pretty sure once I started, that I would pretty much become addicted to them if just for the fact that I would need them to get a decent stretch of sleep. And I'm slightly paranoid of taking some perscription pills as I'm single and live alone and if I have a problem...well, it just doesn't bode well with me being alone.

The swing shift stuff sucks. I don't have it quite as bad, but I rotate every 28 days. Once I get used to nights, its back to days and vice versa. As far as the sleeping pills thing, I had to use something once I started Police work about 7 years ago. I couldn't sleep when it was daylight no matter how dark I made the room. I tried all sorts of pill, but ambien seemed to work the best for a while, then it would only work for a few hours and then I would be up. I went from needing two or three a week to one or two a night.

This is the only time I will thank my insurance, because I used more than script would allow in a 30 day period and they cut me off for close to three weeks. I had no choice but to go cold turkey. The first week was hell, but then something clicked. I was able to sleep without pills because I no other choice and it was mind over matter. After about the third week I was able to sleep any time anywhere just like I was 16 again. I have been pill free for almost 2 years now and have not been better. One thing that helped me the most getting to sleep was no computer at least an hour before bed, don't eat or drink, and take a HOT shower or bath then junp right in bed while still warm.

I will say this though, the pills did get me on the right track and it was my fault I became dependent. I knew I could just pop one and minutes later I was out.

We all battle demons and some sort of depression on a daily basis. Its always been a factor since the creation of mankind except for now we are realizing its ok to talk about it. Years ago you would be considered weak talking about your problems, but now its excepted and there is help out there. I had a very ruff patch a few years ago after my father died and the circumstances involving his death. I still really don't talk about it and I'm not ready to anytime soon, but I deal with it in other ways. One way is the build of my 250r that we were/are both so passionate about.

Good luck to all. Like others have said most of us are just a PM away if you need to talk.

[tulsamike3434]

I am OFFICIALLY off probation as of 3:00 today :D That ought to help my brain a little bit :lol:


MAN that's GREAT I'm Happy for ya!

[atc007]

Whew,,this world works in mysterious ways.. I'm not going to get into what alls going on here right now..I will just stay w my Dads situation.. I had Hospice come in last Friday. He may go tonight,,he may go 4 more months,,,which will Not surprise me. He can still walk w a walker after I stand him and steady him. I have hospital beds for him and Mom,,he flashes back to WWll,and the old logging/ farming days. Trys his damndest to crawl out of bed,,every night ,all night. he's on Halo,,I call it,,short for the real name. I haven't "rested " for 3 weeks. He's gotten out of bed a few times,,fallen twice,he's 91. Anyhow,tonight we start Ambien,,now,,when My brother got Fuc4d on his hip replacement and we had not slept for 3 weeks. They gave it to him.. He was halucinating BIG TIME. Tonight,,Dad was wound for sound ,before meds. I am TOTALLY against meds ,much like Fabio. But I am finding I am human. And not getting younger. Dad needs to sleep,and so does Bill !! He just quit fighting and trying to climb over the bedrails and is out as I type this. Time will tell,,my nurses aid read the side effects,,Holy Sh!t ! Be better off dead IF you got all that is promised! At any rate,,I hope this crap gives Dad some rest!

[Vealmonkey]

And that's the other big thing. Most of these meds have worse side effects then what I'm dealing with (or not dealing with). Why invite all that extra goodness into your life. I work at a factory that covers some 60+ acres and with multiple buiildings. I walk everyday, a mile and sometimes more. If I'm in a hurry, I have a 3 wheeled adult trike to ride, but mostly I walk as I have equipment in different buildings to check. I get bottled water and keep it in my fridge up in my work area. I do like my Seagrams Gingerale, 2% milk and Chik Fil A tea that I water down. I've been watching my calorie intake and slowly losing weight and my uniforms and clothes are getting loose, so I'll have to clothes shop here soon. I'm sounding like a chick here. LOL I eat fruit and yogurt for alot of my sweets, but I'm looking forward to my favorite snowball stand opening up so I can get my weekly ice tea snowball. I don't drink hardly any dark sodas, only on a rare occasion. I rarely drink alcohol, which is amazing since I work at an alcohol blending and bottling facility and I'm giving freebies quite frequently. I generally give the alcohol away, only keeping a bottle or so of each if a friend that stops by cares for a beverage. My greatest calming factor is my cat. I used to enjoy motorcycle riding, but people around here are so careless, that I got rid of my bike for my own personal safety. Well, that and the last time I rode the bike, I almost got run over and arrested, but what are you supposed to do? I was a little freaked out and had broken off the mirror on the girls car and was trying to smash her drivers window so I could yank her out of her car! OOps! While the police officer arrived on scene! Big OOPS!! The people behind me were witnesses for the girl almost running into me while texting on her phone, running me into the opposite lane, while I was locking up the brakes trying to get back on the correct side of the double yellow line. Luckily the lady behind the young girl put on her brakes which gave me some room so I could duck back onto my side of the street. The cop wrote the young girl several tickets after she admitted not seeing me cause she was on the phone. Unreal. Then there is the whole story of what happened to the 57 chevrolet. Another great deal. But, the big deal is, I never have much time off to decompress and wind down. When I went to Brapps pennsyltucky ride, I got off after the midnight shift, stayed awake the whole trip up to Brapps, thankfully Gazoo drove. Then I stayed awake the rest of the day and alot of the night, but got to meet some cool people and even hung with Raffa, what a trip. Then when I was finally falling asleep, and I'm such a crappy sleeper, peoples' snoring kept me up. I didn't ride as it ended up being a mud fest, which really isn't my idea of fun, but at least I made it up there. The next day, Gazoo and I were going visiting, but the area around Brapps is bad and phone service and GPS was hit or miss at best, so that got all messed up and we barely made it to a gas station. I couldn't live in a place like that. Too used to driving a mile and hitting a station and all that. Too remote for me. I don't know how you do it Brapp and 007. And it was almost an act of God to get vacation so I could go up to see the Tiger 500 race in Elmira. So yea, not alot of time off.

[Dirtcrasher]

I take Lorazapam, temazapan and amnitryptolene - spelling may be off. And some nights I simple cannot rest until5AM; So I get 3 or 4hours......

Then your junk all day and it usually screws up the next few days.

[Vealmonkey]

Sadly, the effects of some meds make people way more dangerous. Driving a vehicle, operating heavy equipment or rotating machinery. I work around 93% Sulfuric acid every day, not something that you want to be half unconcious with. Steve, glad your off probation, now don't let me catch you on an episode of cops! LOL Sorry, probably not that funny. I was asked by a psychologist if I ever wanted to hurt myself. I said why hurt myself, it's the other people who I'm gunning for! My sense of humor is pretty whacked. The world doesn't let my mind quit. I mean, why does the money machine in the drive through have braile keys? We're here living in the USA, why does every automated situation ask if you want English or Spanish. That really drove me nuts and the drive through bank teller, worse than the braile keyboard. When you put your bank card in, it should know what language you want. I had a rant with a bank manager once about it. He shrugged his shoulders. Now Bank of America doesn't ask that question anymore. Bank of Americas' slogan should be...."We suck, but we suck everywhere."

[Dirtcrasher]

^ thanks pat it did make me laugh!! :lol:

And I'll be honest, these meds DO have massive side effects. Stone sober; I've felt drunk in my truck and I most CERTAINLY don't want anything to happen. I have to wait about 2hrs. before I feel ok.

Funny thing is, years ago kids didn't have ADHD or sleeping meds, they were tired from playing outside.

Now the world is filled with 14yo girls with phones dressing like a 21yo and heaven forbid we say "god".

Were doomed, however we came about, that person is smacking himself in the head!

[whyzee]

Jeez Bill, you have got alot on your plate! You must have the patience of a saint! How is your Dad doing ? Did you guys finally get some sleep yet?

[atc007]

Thanx for asking Chris. Ahh,we slept from 11-12 and 1:30 to 4 last night. He has dimentia and is back in the old days w his brothers or at World War 2. Now,,,the night before,,that Ambien knocked him out from 8 PM to noon !! I don't like meds,,,but this is THE place for them. I am running on empty,,it's no good for him or I,[ Too mention the other 8 people here to take care of } It will just have to be. I hate it,,but am very grateful it's available to us. Saint?? lol,,all our friends and family say hat,,I would say I'm much more like a drill sergeant,,they all know it comes from a Loving place,,but I say what i mean,and mean what I say,,,rather it's what they wannna hear or not! Hope everyone else is having a great one,,I'm off to take one of the girls for ear infections,,AGAIN.

[whyzee]

Bill , how the heck are you functioning on 3 1/2 hrs of sleep ???
Glad to hear your dad finally got some rest. Sounds like the ambien did the trick . He may need to take it nightly to help him rest and you can hopefully get some rest also. Keep us posted on both of your well beings.

[atc007]

Thanx man, I'm good. So far ! ALL our friends and family say it is not possible,,but I do feel ok,,,more than likely how,,when you come out of surgery and you feel COMPLETELY lucid,and good to go.. And the next day you realize how TOTALLY looped out you were!? I guess that's me now. Even when we do sleep,,the stress is still there. The baby monitors right there,,every breath he takes,,every movement,is he getting over the bed rail? Is he just squiggling? I run and check on him.We sleep ,but don't rest. Dyings part of living,,I am NOT complaining. I had the best Dad in the world, and he's drawing close to the end. But he aint done yet! I am doing the Ambien AS WE SPEAK !! We ALL need some rest tonight. He woke the 2 littlest ones up @ 4 this morning. So we're all beat. Heck,,,I've got it easy compared to some! The guy bitchin and whining about not being able to buy new shoes didn't feel so bad when he met the guy with no feet.. Someone somewhere ALWAYS has it worse.

[tri again]

Blessings to you 007
Hang in there.
You are making the world a better place with your loving concern.

[atc007]

Thanx,,Ambien did the trick again !! He went all night ! I'm rested and ready for another 3 weeks! Now all the girls have bad colds,,so Dad will get pneumonia AGAIN. How's everyone else doing ?