Today was the day..................................

[Mickey Dunlap]

I got the call today that I have dreaded for quite a bit of my life, more so since I got saved 22 years ago, my Dad died this morning. I'm glad I got the news that he passed in his sleep and that he didn't take his own life. I find some comfort in that, and that I had did what I could to share the good news of the gospel with him. Like many people he didn't want to hear it, today he found out the truth, which I find no pleasure in. :cry: There are many emotions I will go through in the coming weeks I'm sure, it has taken me for a pretty good ride already today. Now I have to fly out to Washington to face my family which are not saved either. I wrote this for two reasons, one I have mention before about both my brother that says he has three cancers and isn't getting any help has moved into my Moms house while my Dad has been in a old folks home the past year or so,and that they were both close to dying. So I wanted to share that, but the main thing is, I know there are some born again followers of Christ on here that I would like prayers from and if you have dealt with a un-saved family member that has died, any advice on how to deal with the other un-save family. If you don't want to say anything on here I will be at home until I get a flight out to Washington and you can e-mail me at 4stroke@enbarqmail.com. I have shut Four Stroke Tech down for awhile because I have no idea of what I'm going to do right now, but I'm in good hands.:)

[RIDE-RED 250r]

Sorry to hear of your loss Mickey.

I am not as outspoken about my beliefs as pertaining to religion as some folks, and I am certainly not the picture of what a Christian "should be"... probably wrongfully so..

But I really can't sit here and tell you how to deal with your family in this trying time. Pray on it, use your best judgement. This may or may not be the time to be very outspoken with your family on this subject. Some me be driven more away, some may be receptive. Who is to know? I wish I could say something more definitive than that, but I think it would be pretty arrogant of me to do so.

But I can remember you in a little prayer for comfort in this difficult time...

God bless and travel safe.

[Joseph Farrow]

Sorry for the loss of your Dad. I know he will be truly missed.
You just have to Live by Example and Witness to those who do not Believe.
You and your Family are in my Prayers.

[blue27]

Sorry to hear this Mickey. My thoughts will be with you and your family.

[tripledog]

I would like to offer my most sincere condolences at this difficult time, Mickey. You and your Dad will be in my thoughts and prayers.

[jeswinehart]

Very sorry to hear of your loss Mickey.

Our evening supper prayers tonight will be filled with support for you and your family.

john + Liway

[jays375]

Sorry for your loss.Only thing you can do is go out there.No family is perfect.Not everybody gets along.Basically have to grin and bear in such a situation.Dealing with the loss will be hard enough for you.Don't need to add any more stress.Just remeber the good things and good times.I always liked to hear the stories that are brought up.Plus the pictures that are shown.Lost my father when I was 17.Was the worst thing ever.To this day I still enjoy hearing stories about him.He was quite the charactor.Always had some "brillant idea".My neighbor says he was his own worst enemy.Hope this helps.

[hoosierlogger]

Sorry to hear of the loss, but sometimes it is for the better and we don't realize it. As for the non believers in your family, imho dont force religion on them is the best approach. I was dragged to church every Sunday by my grandmother. I had no interest in it then and I hate sitting through a sermon to this day. Pray for them behind their back, they will never see it coming.

[6speedthumper]

Very sorry to hear of your family's loss. "Saved" or "un-saved", keep religion out of it. Just be there for yourself, your family, and most of all your pop. Share stories and remember all the good times. Best to just "bury the hatchet" at this time, if there are bad feelings between you and your family regarding your religious beliefs.

[danbur55]

my sincere condolences for you and your family and friends having lost my dad just before 18 and then mom at 20 take heart in knowing that you have done what you could if you witnessed to them then it is free will that takes over on their part your prayers and love no matter their choices is all you can do so sorry to hear of your loss but hold to your faith and things will happen as they will

[MIK6]

Sorry to hear about your dad.. our thought are w you and your family.

[El Camexican]

You're in all our thoughts, Christian or not. No one wants to deal with events like this, but we all know they are inevitable and we all have compassion for your loss. Take solace in your memories of him and don't concern yourself too much about where he may or may not be, try instead to believe he's where he wanted to be. May the days ahead lead you to peace.

[kaymo]

Mickey,

I am truly sorry to hear of your loss. my dad has kidney cancer and is doing fairly well fighting it, but i know he will never be the same. i am lucky to have a place here with him, where i can keep an eye on him and spend as much time with him as i can spare. my german shepherd that i have had for 9 years has congestive heart failure and i thank her every day for sticking with me, she has been my rock. i joke that shes "the only trailprotrailprotrailprotrailprotrailpro i truly trust" but its true. I am lucky to have both of them in my life, yet i find myself trying to prepare for their departure... but i just cant. there is no way to prepare. we can only cherish the times that we have with them and never forget how they shaped our lives.

I am not a religious person, but I am a spiritual person. I do not believe that one should be "saved" to get into heaven or have a pleasant afterlife, i just believe that people just treat each other with respect and do the right thing because its the right thing. If the rest of your family is not religious, i think the right thing to do is to be there for them, show them your love and support, and dont expect to try and change anyone's mind about things at such a fragile moment for everyone involved. you can always let them know that you believe he has moved on to a better place, but beyond that it could cause more problems than its worth. like talking about politics. its just asking for trouble. Just go give as much love as you can spare, and accept as much as you can hold.

[Dirtcrasher]

Sorry for your lost; We always want "more time!!" and then they pass..Take care man....

[f76]

My thoughts and prayers for you and your family. May you be a shining light for your family in this dark time.

[clmeue37]

Sorry for your loss Mickey. Prayers are with you and your family.

[Mickey Dunlap]

Thanks everyone. My e-mails have been messed up all week so I'm not getting any right now. I'm headed to the air port now.

A guy I don't know on KawieRiders gave me the words I need to hear. I takes another born again believer to give the words I need , this is what he wrote:



It is not His will that any should perish, but for all to be saved. Just keep praying and witness to them the best way you can. Keep in mind that man can only gain salvation through belief in and confession to Christ, so as long as you've shared your testimony, you did your part. Only you can get yourself into a relationship with God, and only you can keep yourself out of his will. I had a cousin pass away a few years back. He grew up in a Christian home, and chose a life of drug abuse, adultery, and partying. I like to think he had a split second to ask for and receive salvation, but I have my doubts. My pastor often tells the story of when he hit a train in the 60s. He had been saved for some time, and was a deacon. He said God never crossed his mind while he was being pushed sideways for 1/4mile. Today is the day of salvation, yesterday's gone, and tomorrow's not promised.
It hurts to lose a loved one. Knowing that they've entered eternity without salvation is heartbreaking, but Jesus, when asking a potential disciple to follow him, said 'let the dead bury their dead; but go thou and preach the kingdom of God. He also said "give not that which is holy unto the dogs, neither cast ye your pearls before swine, lest they trample them under their feet, and turn again and rend you." Folks are gonna reject the gospel, just like some are gonna accept it and be saved. It's a hard lesson to learn, and harder to apply, but the fact is there are just some people that you just cannot witness to. They'll mock you, spit in your face, and with the help of satan, cause you do be doubtful and lose faith.
The coming days are gonna be hard for you. As selfish as it may seem, I think the best approach is to let your actions speak for you instead of your words. Pray for wisdom and discretion when dealing with your unsaved family members. I find that family and friends are the hardest folks to witness too. Sure, they might know that God has transformed you and that you're a super guy, but odds are that they've also seen you at your worst before AND after you received Christ.
I hope and pray that you continue to be strong in your Christian walk. Don't be discouraged or feel like you're failing God when loved ones leave without a testimony. Seek His will, and go as he directs you. Just know that you did all you could for your father in regards to his salvation, as I'm sure you've tried with your brother as well. Everyone's not gonna accept the truth. I'm sure there were people present when Jesus raised Lazarus who, after witnessing such a miracle, have raised their heads in hell.
This may or may not be what you're looking to hear, and I know it's a little hard, but salvation and kingdom work is something I take seriously, and sugarcoating stuff and handling folks with kid gloves doesn't work for me.
Keep the faith.

[slashfan7964]

Take care man. My condolences to you and your family.

He's in a better place now, one without all the pain and suffering where he can be happy and have everything he wants. Take care man. We're here for you.

[Mickey Dunlap]

I'm back from a very long trip out west but my computer has to go in the shop right now so I'll answer all the pm's when I get it back. I was a very overwhelming trip and I have a lot of fires to put out here at Four Stroke Tech so I'll get back to everyone here in a few day, the GOOD NEWS is my little sister came to Christ last Friday through all this so it was all worth it!

[JayBone]

Sorry for the loss.