I would like to offer my sincere condolences. It hasn't yet been 2 years since my Dad passed. I try to honor my Dad by treating others as he would have. I think about him every day, and while the pain of loss may never go away, I find some solace in knowing that he lived his life, loved his family and friends, and is finally at peace. Now is the time for you to be with family and friends, for being stoic and distant during such a difficult time is not good for one's well being. Don't let the pain and negative thoughts overpower you. I wish the best for you and your family.
Just as 86T3 offered, if you need an ear to bend, feel free to PM me.